Welcome to Uncomfortable Conversations About Money, a new series where we will tackle topics or situations around money that well, make you uneasy. We’ll outline the problem and try to get you some usable solutions.
First, we’ll take on what for some is likely an annual holiday problem: the parent-grandparent battle over spoiling the grandkids.
Too many Hot Wheels
The dilemma: Grandparents who, against the parents’ wishes, buy the grandkids extravagant gifts, loud, annoying toys or simply too much stuff.
Parent’s view: Andrew Herzog of Irving, Texas, and his wife, Michelle, have two young children, 3-year-old Patrick and newborn Evelyn. His parents often baby-sit the kids and Chris Herzog (Papa) is especially close to Patrick.
Though Patrick and Evelyn are the first grandkids on both sides of the family, Andrew said neither set of grandparents has overly spoiled the grandkids – yet. But to make sure they don’t overindulge, Andrew, who also happens to be a certified financial planner with The Watchman Group in Plano, Texas, says its important as the parents to communicate and set some guidelines.
“If the grandparents don’t even know how you feel about loud toys, it’s not their fault,” he said. “You must communicate in advance the guidelines to help grandparents pick appropriate/enjoyable gifts” – and if they still buy a loud toy, send it to the grandparents’ house, he said.
Andrew isn’t a total Grinch about overindulging the little ones.
“There’s ample…
